YOU'RE NOT YOUR EMPLOYMENT STATUS

There is a thing in psychology called working identity.
Usually, overachievers, people that are always looking for the next challenge and seem never to have enough, associate their employment status and function with their identity.
And so did I.

I had no problems with self-esteem at work. I was confident about my competencies, qualifications, and experience. In my mind, I was a high achiever, and the results spoke for themselves.
Headhunters would chase me, and turning them down gave me immense pleasure, I confess. I was powerful; I had the money, the status, and the job I wanted.
Work was my top priority, I ignored all the rest. I think this is called hyperfocus nowadays.
I was not Fabiana, I was the Financial Controller, the expert.

So you can imagine how hard it was for me to receive the news that the company did not do well during my second maternity leave, and my position was eliminated (that's the official version).
I was there in a beautiful meeting room made of glass. The same place I made so many work meetings. The HR and Controlling Manager almost couldn't look me in the eye.
I heard them and dared to ask for feedback. In my mind, I was not going to leave that room without making them tell in my face how I could improve.
And so I heard that my work was impeccable, but I missed agility and leadership skills.

I left that building sobbing, people looked at me in disbelief. I felt humiliated, I felt small.
I entered my car and immediately called my husband. And his words meant the world to me. "Don't worry, we're in this together.”
It was the end of my career, I had no job, and I was going to perish. And now with two babies. All I could think about was bad, really bad.
It took me three years to have the courage to forgive myself and repurpose the memories of that day.
From high to low, from I have it all to I'm not enough.
It was a big trauma. 

Moving to a new country brought shame and unworthy feelings back to my life.
Because I compared myself to others all the time. And I was always inferior in everything: education, language, manners, looks.
My game started to change when, after the resignation and the international relocation, I started to love and accept myself just the way I am.

I finally understood that work is something I do, not who I am.
Maybe this is why to me is not that hard to change careers (I'm in my third profession now).
What others fear the most, the unknown, is my fuel.   
If my story resonates with your moment, book a call, and let's chat.
My job is to hold space, so you remember who you are. This is how we're going to find your next job and meet financial freedom again.
Now hit reply and tell me: how did you feel after reading this message?
You're not alone.

Let's rock.



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